Get Your Hand Out My Pocket - Darnyelle A. Jervey Speaker, Coach, Author

Do you remember the movie Malcolm X? At the end, when they had finalized their plot to kill him, they got the ruckus started with a man standing up and saying "Get your hand out my pocket," in a loud and charasmatic voice.

When I began to think of what I wanted to blog about today, I thought of that movie and what that meant to me. Your pocket is a symbol of possession and possession is often tied to money or lack there of. If you happen to have an unhealthy relationship with money, your pockets are probably empty.

When it comes to healthy relationships, whatever we love, honor and respect creates a foundation for relationship success. i mean think about it. Think of you boo...you love him/her right? On what foundation is that relationship based? Honesty, integrity, trust, collaboration, etc I could go on and on....The same must be true of your love affair OR emotional rollercoaster with money.

Many people are caught up in a mindset that money is evil. But let me be clear, money is not evil....an obsession of money that alienates others is evil. And that obsession could be positive or negative. If you are so caught up in what you don't have that it stifles you, you are obsessed with the very thing you don't have and that can be constrewed as evil.

As the Bible says, you cannot serve two masters. I am not suggesting you serve money, quite the contrary. I am suggesting that you understand the reason why money exists and develop a healthy understanding as to why you need it in your life.

Again, let me be clear. You need money, as do I. Money gives us choices, and when you invite the shift of how to look at money and how respecting money for its purpose can allow you to live in a space that is the opposite of lack - abundance life can truly begin.

1. Complete a Self-Assessment of what you think of money. Is it healthy or unhealthy? When you were growing up, did you live with people who constantly said, "I don't want to be rich, I just want to get by?" Did you constantly tell yourself and others, "It's not about the money; I don't need to be rich?" That is not the abundance that Jesus died for and you are entitled to. How do you feel when you have money? How do you feel when you don't? Do you have healthy spending habits? Are you always saying I'm broke? Are you upset or jealous when you see others with money? These are unhealthy traits that are affecting your ability to have a great relationship with money.

2. Be honest with yourself. Own it and then prepare to change what needs to change to develop a healthy appreciation for money. What do you need money for? Why would money be a blessing to your life? Who would you be able to help if you have more than enough money?

3. Develop a relationship with a coach to help you to change your mindset and create an alignment that speaks to the abundance to which you are entitled.

4. Give. By giving, you attract money to come back to you. I give away $1 a day by hiding it in a place that someone will find it and be blessed. $1 won't break your checkbook but it will change your financial picture. Don't believe me...try it for yourself. Don't make it about you. Just arbitrarily hid $1 and know that your generosity will bless some one else. I know that the law of reciprocity is at work when you freely give of the abundance that has been given to you.

Be Incredible...it's already in you,
Darnyelle

Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reserved.

Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. It is her desire to connect with women and help them to achieve a balance in life and business that allows for their Passion, Abuandance, Confidence and Expectation to create the Incredible life that they were created to live. For more information or to complete your FREE 30-minute coaching consultation request, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com

You're Blind Baby - Darnyelle A. Jervey - Speaker, Coach, Author

I think it was Public Enemy who rapped the song, "You Can't See"...I woke up this morning and as I reflected on how grateful I am to be here experiencing so many Incredible things, I thought about each of you. In the song, Flava Flav and Chuck D sing "You can't see what I can see, you're blind baby, blind to the facts." And before you get mad at me for calling you blind, let me explain what I mean.

It's the first Walk it Out Wednesday in the last month of the first quarter of the new decade. Many of you got excited about the new year and set Big goals yet you can't really see them manifesting in your life. Many of you do things just because it seems cute or so that you don't stand out like a sore thumb. But you do stand out because you are wandering aimlessly through your life trying to do this and that without vision and purpose.

Stop.

Today, I encourage you to begin to give yourself a check up from the heart up - what is your life description? (similar to a job description, but for your entire life) What do you want for your family? Yourself? Your Career? Your Marriage or Relationship? What is that one thing that you want to be able to go to your death bed saying, but I did it?

If you keep meandering through life without a vision and a plan, you are blind. You may see others achieving and get jealous about what they have. What it seems like they are doing somehow appears to be exactly what you want YET you refuse to create a plan for the vision so that you too can enjoy it.

We live in an abundant universe and there is a generous portion waiting for you when you begin to see. What's holding you back?

Heller Keller says, "there's nothing more pathetic than a person with sight but no vision." Einstein says "imagination is more important than fact." Proverbs says, "without vision, the people perish."

You will die if you don't begin to see.

Open your blinded eyes and for the first time this year, See. See who you are. See whose you are. See that you are bigger than your problems, See that you are a solution, see that anything is possible. See what is possible for you and then write it down. Check your vision by creating a written account of what you desire to bring into your experience.

Join us tonight at 6 pm EST for step by step coaching on your Check Up from the Heart Up. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/aimwd or 347.324.5086.

Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.

Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to more than motivation, she impacts skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. For more information, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.

Get Somewhere and Sit Down - Darnyelle A. Jervey: Speaker, Coach, Author

When I was little, I was often found in a place I had no business (no surprise, I'm sure) and an adult would always yell, "Darnyelle Antoinette you had better get somewhere and sit down!" Powerful words which are filled with lessons that we should apply to our lives today. I've notice in working with clients from around the country the location may be different but the story is the same: We don't spend enough time "getting somewhere and sitting down."

Have you ever meditated? Have you ever just STOPPED what you were doing and centered yourself?

Maybe you need to. It could change your life. It changed mine

I believe in the power to get quiet and truly tap into your spirit and begin to live and breathe from your heart because it offers an experience that is Incredible! It renews your focus on what truly is important. HINT: It's usually NOT what we think it is before we get somewhere and sit down!

In general, we are way too busy, way too focused on things that don't matter and we spend too much time sweating the small stuff. I invite you to find a quiet place, light a candle, turn on some soft, comforting music and repeat the following phrases:
I Love You. I'm Sorry. Please Forgive Me. Thank You.

I love You - you are talking to yourself. We spend way too much time being overly critical of every step we take and we never stop to celebrate our success and accomplishments. We want others to say these three words but if we don't say them to ourselves, how can we expect others to say them to us? From the self-love you express to yourself, you explore and unleash the power to change mindsets and live dreams.

I'm Sorry - again you are talking to yourself and you are apologizing for not being authentic, for focusing on things that don't matter, for not taking time to tap into your spirit and live from your heart.

Please forgive me - you are talking to the Creator, now that you have apologized to yourself, ask for His forgiveness so that you can be liberated to go forth, refreshed and renewed.

Thank You - in an extreme act of gratitude, you are talking again to the Creator and thanking Him for His sovereignty and for creating you. Abundance is all around us and as I was recently reminded we miss it because we need to be in control. Control is the arch nemesis of abundance, I encourage you to let go and watch the overflow come into your life.

Repeat over and over until a calm settles in your heart. After you've finshed the four phases and you feel a sense of release and a reneweing of your spirit, stay there long enough to enjoy the journey upon which you are about to embark now that you are free to fill your heart with all the abundance it can hold.

Be Incredible,
Coach Darnyelle

Darnyelle A. Jervey is the speaker, coach and author that founded Incredible One Enterprises, a full service empowerment firm committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in You. For more information about Darnyelle, please visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com

Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reerved.

Stop, Drop, LOVE - Darnyelle A. Jervey - Speaker, Coach, Author

I was talking with my mother the other day and she was a little distraught because she felt like she was being pulled in too many directions in the name of love. The coach in me immediately kicked in and I began to ask her direct, probing questions to get to the root of the concern she was feeling as well as to help her work through this occurence so that she could find release. She said, "I just want to help everybody, but it seems like no one wants to help me." I said, mom what do you mean? She said, "there seems to be no boundaries in this thing and I am the one who loses."

How many of you have felt the same way? I understand how you feel. I've been there, done that and gotten the t-shirt. But what I found was that by establishing my worth and what I would do as a result of my worth, I could set boundaries that ensure that interactions with loved ones became a win/win situation.

"But you don't understand, Coach Darnyelle," I can hear you say. But I do understand and that is why I'm writing this blog today.

My mom pricked my spirit because she is one of the most loving women I know. She'd give you the shirt off her back if it would make you smile or feel secure. Most of us women are the same way. I know sometimes we get a bad rep over being too strong, but it is the strength in you that makes it possible for all who come into your space to feel the love that knows no limits. Yet, here I am suggesting that you set some.

For your sanity.

Stop. Drop. Love. It's that simple.

Stop - when you feel taxed and out of control and you feel compelled to say yes because your yes will ensure it gets done effectively. STOP. Take a moment or two or three and reflect on what adding another thing to your plate will do to your plate. Where is your "me" time? How will you get your "Me" time if you consistently do for others before yourself. Now, let me clear, I believe in serving others but I also believe in everything in proper order and perspective.

Drop - drop the rules of engagement for the task being brought to you. Remember, no one can make you feel anxious or out of balance without your consent. Drop the act that you are okay that they are asking you to do something that someone else could do. You may be manipulated to think it can't be done if you don't do it. Don't buy into that, if it is as essential as they claim, someone will rise up to do it.

Love - even when you say "no" or in everything that you do, do it in love. When you live from your heart, it will always be your desire to offer love, kind, life affirming words and challenges into the lives of others. Just because you are saying "no, not this time," doesn't mean that you can't do it in love and maintain the relationship if that is your desire. Most of us take on more tasks in fear - fear that we will somehow lose the relationship or position if we don't act. One question....do you really want it if that's a possibility?

Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified life coach, professional speaker and author committed to helping women who are struggling to find the balance of their PACE (Passion Abundance Confidence Expectation). As the founder and CEO of Incredible One Enterprises, a full service empowerment firm in Newark, DE, she is more than a motivator, she imparts skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. Recently featured in the January 2010 issue of Black Enterprise Magazine, her Burn the Box Coaching Program is transforming the lives of women nationwide. For more information or to request your FREE 30-minute coaching consultation, please visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com

Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reserved